A Time of Fire Breathing Dragons

Everywhere I go, tension is in the air.
Everyone is on edge.
Fear. Anger. Rage.
Helplessness. Hopelessness.
The battle rages and the fires burn hot.

And the tongue is a fire,
a world of iniquity
so is the tongue
among our members,
that it defiles the whole body
and sets on fire the course of nature;
and it is set on fire of hell. James 3:6

The country, the world, is set ablaze

by the tongues of the careless,

the ruthless, the devious,

the despicable, the deplorable.

People have become dragons, 

spewing fire at one another.

Dragons who fight to lead,

Scaly, shifty, demons,

Drag them behind them 

with long spiky tails.

The dragons stand on platforms.

Platforms that stand for what?

Life, Rights under God, justice, patriotism

Self serving choice, tolerance, globalism

What a testimony of ignominy,

That a once great nation is divided

Light and dark

The dark made light,

The light made dark.

Both represented by dragons.

Where are the dragon slayers?

The noble hearts with noble quests

ready in the whole armor of God?

Not to conquer with flaming tongues,

But with loving truth and deeds that

Stand where Governments fail,

and darkness would seem to prevail.

Tame the tongue ablaze with rage,

Spend time on the knees,

Seeking the Heart of God

And the taming of dragons.

Speak truth in love and patience.

Stand in faith for what is right,

Walk the talk, take the heat.

Offering cool cups of living water,

Some will drink
and quench their thirst,

and the dragon tongues
will morph to bless.

Others will refuse
and cling to the fire,

For dragon power is
all consuming.

Will the dragon wars come to an end

When one dragon remains victor?

Once the fires are set,

An often long battle ensues

To douse and snuff them out.

Dragon slayers and firefighters must prevail.

Taming tongues and battling their blazes.

Noble men and women with servants hearts

Must come forward and be chosen

To replace the dragons that would lead,

If this Nation and its citizens are to remain free.

The Power of the Quirky Heart

Up at night, can't sleep. The heart is pounding. At times it races.

At times it does a jig. At times it plays hop scotch.

It is as finicky as a cat, as mischievous as an imp,

Sleep on the wrong side, it protests.

Eat or drink something it doesn't like, it protests, sometimes for hours.

Slouch on the couch it becomes a grouch.

Try to kick up the workout a notch or two, and it complains like a child stamping his feet in protest.

Just try to fall asleep. It starts its jig.

Watch an intense flick and it starts its annoying kicking, like the kid at a movie theater kicking the back of your seat.

When sound asleep, it pounds to wake you then races in the 100 yard dash.

Often it gives no reason for its quirky behavior.

Internet search after internet search reveals hundreds or thousands of these temperamental hearts, which are driving as many minds crazy.

Doctor visits, emergency room visits, and test after test are caused yearly by these hearts, but those tricky little muscles behave themselves when they are being watched.

It is a plot to get the brain into trouble, for the poor brains are labeled "anxious". It's just stress the "experts" say. And the hearts snicker, pleased with themselves for the success of their ongoing prank.

Oh, the jigs, races, pounding and tantrums are harmless. They won't kill you. Nothing to worry about.

The heart acts out. The brain ignores it. The heart does a jig. The brain finds a distraction. The heart races and skips. The brain prays and meditates. The heart relentlessly throws a fit until the brain can no longer resist the temptation to fret. The heart dances with glee when it drives the brain to seek medical attention. Then, on cue, as soon as it is on stage for all to see, it beats steady and sure. And once again the brain is blamed and labeled anxious.

Occasionally, the stomach and heart team up to trick the brain. Yet the heart always leaves the stomach to take the blame with the brain. And the "anxious" brain is bullying the poor sensitive stomach to the point it makes it sick. The stomach gets the medicine, the brain gets blamed, and the heart is extremely satisfied with itself.

These quirky, finicky, tricky, impish hearts seem to be fit from all the extra activity. They know it. And the brain knows it. But when the heart thumps, skips, flips and races for extra attention, often enough, sometimes day and night, the brain eventually caves to the pressure once again.

Oh the power of the Quirky heart.

Lori Vidak

8-20-16

The Change

When women speak of "The Change," most understand that this is code for the transition period a woman makes into menopause. Let me tell you, those two little words describe this time of life perfectly.

My sleep patterns have changed: very little to none.

My diet, already restrictive, has changed. Everything I was hypersensitive to, I am now super hypersensitive to. Cut out the sugar. Cut out the simple carbs, like pasta, bread, white rice, etc., etc., etc, I can barely eat half a meal and must eat several times a day to ward off the low blood sugar shakes.

Every day, my hair decides to add highlights all on its own. Silver ones!

My skin gets a few more spots, drys out more easily, and decides to mimic crepe paper in a few not so concealed places.

My face has a few new creases. Dark circles, from lack of sleep and new allergies (not yet on the list of changes), give me the Goth look without makeup. My lips seem to be shrinking or, in the very least, are blending in around the edges with my skin. And the hook at the end of my Scottish nose is growing so long, I'm afraid I might start cackling any day now.

My belly has added a hedge of protection around the middle. I barely eat half of what use to sustain my activities, and I exercise!

Speaking of exercise, my routine has changed. I have had to tone down the heavy aerobics and have to add more yoga and Pilates, not that I mind this much. I had been meaning to do so. This "Change" makes it a necessity instead of a preference.

Dare I mention my sex life? I never thought I would go from a few times a day, to a few times a year. And, this is the real shocker; not miss it that much.

Suddenly, I have to use perfume, essential oils, body sprays, deodorizing bath soaps, and feminine wipes. I can't stand all the new odors that are introducing themselves into my life. At least now I know why all my old aunties use to smell so strong of Jean Nate.

I use to read the fine print. I still can with my super magnifiers. I have several different pairs of glasses, for reading, watching television, and the real up close and personal stuff.

 I use to be like a cat. I could see perfectly in the dark. Not now, driving at night is hair raising.

The shimmy and shake was only part of a dance routine. Lately, it's become a routine of its own.

Busyness was a part of paying bills and having a life. It has become a means of distraction from all the weird things my body and mind are doing.

All these changes and the one thing that hasn't changed yet is my cycle. I'm still having one regularly. This does not bode well.

I realize that this list might be terrifying to the younger generations of women, who have yet to look forward to "The Change." The media would have you be very afraid. More cosmetic surgeries, cosmetic wrinkle creams, anxiety meds, diet pills, fad diets, and the next "anti-aging" discovery will be sold. Women, the fear of  "The Change" is a gold mine.

Here are the blessings within these changes.

More me-time.
More prayer time.
More bible time.
(What better way to spend those sleepless, restless nights?)
More time in the presence of my Lord. (This is the best!)

I don't worry about my weight right now. The changes to my diet and exercise habits will eventually take care of that. And should it not, well, who am I trying to impress? As long as I'm healthy, I'm okay with it. This would never have been the case before "The Change".

I don't spend as much time in front of the mirror to do my hair or makeup. The more I do, the more I see, (when I have my glasses on.)  Which, I prefer not to when looking in the mirror. Soft focus is much more attractive.

Anxiety is only a physical nuisance. I am learning not to worry about it.

Time with family and friends is much more precious.

Peaceful moments are more preferred than exciting ones. (I get plenty of "excitement" on a daily and nightly basis when my heart pounds or skips around and I shake and shudder from adrenaline surges.)

Creativity is enhanced.

And, so is my sense of humor.

There are many other blessings. "The Change" makes you look for them and see them more clearly. And, you get to share them with others.

So, in summary, "The Change" is many changes happening seemingly all at once. It's an adventure if you choose to look at it that way--with plenty of roller coaster rides-- and an ever-increasing appreciation for the still moments in between. Keep or get a sense of humor about it. Go with the flow or lack thereof. (Sorry--couldn't resist. It's okay to roll your eyes.)

My best advice is to seek the presence of the Lord in the scary moments, the quiet moments and the thankful moments. Don't hesitate to call out to Him and share your thoughts, fears, and discomforts. Sing songs of praise and worship in the darkness as well as the light. Pray for others. The list will increase and your focus on yourself will decrease. The ever deepening relationship with Jesus is worth every discomfort, and every blessing.

Shalom.

Lori Vidak
6-23-16

Don't Be too Hard on Mrs. Bennet

When I first read Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen, I was closer to Jane Bennet's age and did think Mrs. Bennet a somewhat ridiculous creature. Now close to Mrs, Bennet's age, I understand her. Women of our age go through drastic changes physically, mentally and emotionally. For instance the past few months, I have been experiencing some severe symptoms of perimenopause: nightly hot flushes, adrenaline surges, full-blown panic attacks (several per night and day,) muscle aches and stiff joints, abdominal pains, bloating, tender breasts, and more.

Two nights ago, stretched out upon my bed in the wee hours of the morning, unable to sleep, the attacks were horribly bad-- heart palpitations, flutters, muscle spasms, anxiety, and uncontrollable shaking-- aware of every little pain, twitch and tingle. After much prayer, reading of the Psalms and listening to relaxing music, the Lord blessed me with a thought to put my troubles in perspective and give me at least some mental relief. I suddenly recalled the scene with Mrs. Bennet after Lydia ran away with Mr. Wickham where she lay in her bed, crying and complaining to Jane, Elizabeth, Mary and Kitty of her ailments and the distress caused by the actions of her "baby" Lydia, which she blamed upon the neglect of the Forsters.



In the midst of my self-pity, I had to laugh!

Poor Mrs. Bennet was going through the change of life! She wasn't making up her complaints. They were very real. Throughout the pages of Pride and Prejudice her anxious nature and her obsessive behaviors are documented. Though Mr. Bennet and her daughter Elizabeth considered her silly and shallow, her other daughters were respectful of her, I would dare say they understood her. After all, her concern was for them, with a bit of self-preservation mixed in with her motives

In that era and society, to become poor was a terrifying prospect, but to be a poor widow woman was the worst of nightmares! In her mind, she had made a good match for herself, marrying a gentleman with an estate above modest, but fate and the laws of the land that entailed the estate to the closest male heir robbed her and her daughters of their security, the security of a good dowry for the girls and the assurance of comfort in her golden years.  

Her sole purpose in life was to secure a better one for her daughters. 

Anything that interfered with her objectives or endangered her plans was extremely vexing. She would be very anxious indeed. And though I doubt she had a full realization of the consequences that Lydia's actions could have caused, she was aware enough to know that everything that she had hoped for, every security that she had placed in advantageous marriages for her children, was jeopardized. Had not Mr. Darcy coerced Mr. Wickham to marry Lydia, the family would have been ostracized from all "good" society, thus dooming her and the girls to a life so below their current means and status that she could foresee only misery and doom. Her fears were well-founded.

Such stress could easily throw her into a series of sleepless nights and fitful days, hot flashes and panic attacks. All of which are very real physical, painful and frightening reactions to bear that can go on for days, weeks, months--even years! Jane had compassion for her mother; Mary, patience, and Kitty, patient support. Yet Mr. Bennet could not understand--he was a man, after all. And Elizabeth could not understand, being young and independent, favoring her father, until she--too--was faced with the reality of an impoverished life and saw the misery that her mother suffered as a result of the anxiety.

How many of today's women around her time of life could cope with the disappointment of a wayward child; the loss of her dreams and hopes for a secure future and the futures of her other children; as well as anxiety attacks, pains, spasms and palpitations without Xanax, Valium, hormone replacement therapy, and psychiatric or psychological therapy? Without these, Mrs. Bennet had to cope. Give the woman a break!




Lori Vidak
4-16-16

A Cogitation from God

   Woke early this Saturday morning with a headache. Unable to go back to sleep, the quiet encouraged pondering. God is triune in Nature--Father, Son and Holy Spirit. The Trinity is God. The Father is God. Yeshua is God. The Holy Spirit is God. Three persons are one God. I know this to be true, even though this concept is beyond my human mind to totally grasp.
   Then, as though to help me better grasp the nature of God, examples found in nature and my culture popped into my mind. A pride of lions is one. Each lion is an individual member of the pride. There's the Alpha male and Alpha female then the rest of the pride. They all work together as the pride. The same with a wolf pack.
   In marriage, a man and woman become one flesh. Two individuals become one in name, finances, and the purpose of procreation. The more unified the couple, the stronger the marriage. When children come along, a new oneness in function is added called family.
  In team sports, you have the team. You cannot have a team unless each individual member of the team does his part for and with the team.
   Our earth is part of  a solar system. What is the solar system? Our sun, the planets, their moons some asteroids and a comet or two. And then there's a galaxy. What is a galaxy? A unit of solar systems and whatnots, even black holes.
   I think of a tree. A tree is the leaves, the roots, the trunk and the branches.
   Humans are mind. body and spirit. The physical body is made up of billions of different cells functioning as one. The mind is billions of thoughts, memories, dreams and problem solving functions. The spirit is what makes me, me. It is the eternal part of me. The part of me that functions beyond my five senses. The spirit is what makes living things not simply computers and robots.

   These are simplistic examples, and I could go on and on with other examples as new ones present themselves. However, these serve the purpose, at least for me, to show that God is Father, Son and Holy Spirit. God has revealed himself as Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Each person in the Trinity is required together as God. Each person of the Trinity is in nature God. They are the eternal union. In a way they are the Mind, Body and Spirit of God. Again, God is so much more than my finite brain can fathom, in this time and space. Nevertheless, I am touched that the Lord gave me some visual aids to help me learn more about Him as a reward for my faith.

  So, I have shared this mornings musings. They are God's whispers to me in the quiet when I will hear Him. I always feel blessed that He cares enough to give me personal tutoring sessions.

Lori Vidak
3-7-15

Mercy and Patience of the Almighty God

     While I prefer to use this blog for stories that bring the Bible or the principles of following the Way of Yeshua the Messiah to everyday life, I am compelled in this post to share the great and awesome mercy and patience of the Almighty God, my Father.
     Consider the Good News--That the Almighty God, Eternal Father, Creator in His Wisdom and love for us, for you, has given life--true life. Without freedom of will, we would be robots. We would only do what we created to do. However, because of free will, we can do as we choose--within the boundaries of the physical universe, the boundaries of the flesh. His purpose was to create us for fellowship and for honest fellowship with the Almighty, we must choose Him.
    Fellowship is between the Creator, an eternal, omniscient, being beyond our capacity to fully fathom, and me, or you, a created, finite, fragile being with limited understanding in comparison. I can hardly grasp why the Almighty would want to fellowship with me, and you, yet it is a fact the He does. Not only does He want fellowship, He wants to be family. His desire is that we become one with Him. Ponder the implications!
     However, because we are sentient beings, with freedom of will, we can--and all have--chosen to go against God's will--His design or purpose. We are egocentric, deny His existence in Our own wisdom, designate His authority to some other god of our own creation, including ourselves.  We mess up our lives, the lives of others, the environment and so on, without even consulting the Designer of all things. We taint ourselves. Unfortunately, because God is holy He can't connect with us or even look upon us when we are in such a state. His anger burns against us for our choices, as it must!
     How then can we survive His anger and the punishment that must ensue? How can he spare us?
     Understand, God knew beforehand when He created us that we would be like this in our very nature--why? Because we are not God. We are not all knowing, all seeing, all powerful--and we have to learn this. As Creator, Supreme Being, Sovereign of All, He must have boundaries and consequences for crossing those boundaries. After all, all the universe is ordered even in its chaos. Their are physical laws that even the stars must obey.
     In His mercy, He provided a way--the Way. He gave his only Begotten Son, the Son of His exact nature and being, to take upon him the punishment that we--rebellious, self-centered, careless, thoughtless, creatures that we are--deserve. Because of His Perfect Love for us, even knowing everything we have ever done or will do, even knowing our every thought, even knowing the depths of our hearts, He offers mercy--but on His terms according to His rules. Because of pride, the original sin of the very devil, we can't earn mercy. It is a gift. Only He could take on the penalty of our sins, because only He is pure and only He could bear the penalty of the fullness of His own wrath.
     Since He paid the penalty, took the affliction upon Himself through His son, who is His very Nature and one with Him, not one of us need bare the penalty of His wrath.

     Wrath?! How can a good God have wrath toward anyone or anything?
     Just take a look at the news. Take a good look in your community, your family, your own life. Doesn't it make you angry to see murder, rape, child abuse, spouse abuse, robbery, disregard for the environment, disregard for human and animal lives? If you created life, how would you feel about the millions of babies that are brutally and mercilessly torn to pieces and removed from the womb? How would you feel upon seeing millions of dogs, cats and other animals neglected, tortured, and abandoned? How would you like to see the Earth plundered of its resources without good stewardship and planning to replenish those resources? How would you feel when people walk right past their fellow man, woman or child in their community that is homeless, hungry, thirsty, almost naked and does nothing as though that person didn't exist or was a nuisance? How would you feel if you saw families being torn apart by affairs and divorce? Society being twisted by the perverse desires and passions of those who insist perversion is a form of normal? What about mass genocide? What about mass poisoning of entire populations by the greed of those in the food and drug industry that push their chemicals and genetic mutations upon people, declaring them to be good or to heal their diseases. Take a good look! What about those of us who have cheated on our taxes? What of those of us who have abused the welfare system? What about those of us who have lied? What of those of us who have amassed debt through credit to satisfy our needs or our whims? Do we really stop to consider the consequences these things will have upon our future, our family, friends, neighbors, or the world in general? The mess goes on and on? How can Almighty God not be angry, even in His love?
     Now, I share this:  Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God, a sermon written by Jonathan Edwards and delivered to his congregation on July 8th, 1741. This sermon should be given in every church, and shared with as many people who don't attend church as possible. Please read this. It should change your life, even if you are already saved. I implore you, don't just shrug this off. Read it! It is more appropriate in our day than it was in his day. In this sermon, he reveals the side of God that is not politically correct, that is ignored. But to know our Father, to know our Savior, we must understand His total Sovereignty and Awesomeness. We must understand that He is to be feared in His wrath. How else can we fully appreciate the price of mercy? I love my Father all the more for His patience in holding back the fullness of the evil that is our own hearts! For if He did not, Hell on this Earth would be fully realized! This sermon describes the hell that is within us as we resist or ignore God's offer of mercy and refuse to accept His Salvation. We are condemned already! Accept the grace and mercy of Yeshua's death on the cross and the promise of salvation that His resurrection assures! Walk in newness of life! Discover the fullness of Our Father's love and fellowship. Partake of the joy and peace that oneness brings. What are you waiting for?

Heather's Song

Fleeting was your life my dearest one.
Darkness and light in one flickering candle.
A spark, a brilliant flash; it was done.

Your smile was so very beguiling,
Your eyes as blue as a cold mountain lake in spring,
Golden hair soft as an angle's wing.

In the midst of poverty you were born to shine,
A gift of smiles, hugs, giggles and song,
A little girl so badly wanting to belong,
With so few to play with, you had a right to whine.

Fleeting was your life my dearest one.
Darkness and light in one flickering candle.
A spark, a brilliant flash; it was done.

Your smile was so very beguiling,
Your eyes as blue as a cold mountain lake in spring,
Golden hair soft as an angel's wing.

Out of a vast array of music and lyrics
Somehow you managed to find your voice,
And exerted your freedom of choice,
With a rebel heart, to defy and taunt critics.

Fleeting was your life my dearest one.
Darkness and light in one flickering candle.
A spark, a brilliant flash; it was done.

Your smile was so very beguiling,
Your eyes as blue as a cold mountain lake in spring,
Golden hair soft as an angel's wing.

You were an instrument of the Lord God Almighty,
To teach patience with your obstinance,
To reflect our own darkest substance,
And test our true hearts' constancy.

Fleeting was your life my dearest one.
Darkness and light in one flickering candle.
A spark, a brilliant flash; it was done.

Your smile was so very beguiling,
Your eyes as blue as a cold mountain lake in spring,
Golden hair soft as an angel's wing.

That same Lord blessed you with many gifts.
Beauty of the fairest and a voice angelic,
Boldness, laughter and all artistic,
But one by one they were lost in your tragic rifts.

Fleeting was your life my dearest one.
Darkness and light in one flickering candle.
A spark, a brilliant flash; it was done.

Your smile was so very beguiling,
Your eyes as blue as a cold mountain lake in spring,
Golden hair soft as an angel's wing.

Your affliction empowered your bitterness,
Your bitterness fueled your anger,
How could you not become bipolar
As they battled with your happiness and sweetness.

Fleeting was your life my dearest one.
Darkness and light in one flickering candle.
A spark, a brilliant flash; it was done.

Your smile was so very beguiling,
Your eyes as blue as a cold mountain lake in spring,
Golden hair soft as an angel's wing.

Do not despair rescuer of homeless urchins,
Lover of stray dogs and rag dolls,
Seeker and friend to the worlds oddballs,
In the darkest, hopeless night His Son's light glistens.

Everlasting life for you dearest one.
The Son's glory with you a light eternal.
A spark, a brilliant flash; it is done.

Your smile is so very beguiling,
Your eyes as blue as a cold mountain lake in spring,
Golden hair soft as Your angel wings.

By Lori Dawn Vidak


In loving memory of my little sister.
November 22, 2014